You’re an African American 9 year old girl. You live in a nice neighborhood in Alabama. The sun shines, the days are long. You love math and want to become a scientist one day. You have those “Big American Dreams”. You’re still so pure. You have so much hope for the world. You walk down those sunny streets to go to school. School is where you know you have to start to achieve your dreams. You walk in, happy as can be. You meet this boy. He’s a nice boy. You guys click. You guys talk about everything and anything without worry or fear. You’re 9, there’s only so much to talk about anyway. He’s white, but you think, “why should that matter…?” It shouldn’t. But the kids at your school beg to differ…

You’re called all types of names and bullied.

“Kill yourself.”

“You think you’re white because you ride with that white boy.”

“You ugly.”

“Black bitch.”

“Just die.”

The thoughts overwhelm you. Anxiety takes over. You find yourself crying. You feel hopeless. You have all these negative feelings. You’re not accepted cause the color of your skin. How will you become anything if you’re not accepted because your skin is not white? “What is this” you think to yourself. You’ve never felt this way before.

You can’t take it much longer. You’ve been eaten up from the inside by these negative feelings. It’s reached your heart, the source of all your love. All your hope. All your dreams. You only see one way out. And now those negative feelings begin to show on the outside. The outside damage has managed to fully break your heart.

You’ve given up.

On December 3rd, 2018, McKenzie Nicole Adams was found dead by her grandma. She was 9 years old. She was bullied for developing a relationship with a white male while being African American herself. She should’ve never been hurt in such a way that caused her to feel devalued to the point where she felt like she was worth nothing. Where she felt like her life meant nothing, even though it was worth everything. Especially to her mother, who mourned, “My world is gone … my first love…” Her everything was stolen from her cause her skin was darker than the other kids.

It’s always because of color.

– Rose Torres